you know what,
im not used to sitting on chairs under the fans in class.
im not used to the lack of trees around me.
im not used to the luxury around me.
everything feels different .
i miss the perfume everyone wore
which chased the mozzies away.
being able to sleep in longer feels wierd.
i miss the torch light and voices coming into my tent,
those that wake me up when its time.
i miss being up high in the air.
i miss the deep waters.
im not used to seeing so many buildings around me.
im not quite used to taking these public transports.
i miss using the compass.
everyone looks wierd in their uniforms.
it feels different moving about in school.
the solid concrete ground,
the easy way around,
the luxury of staircases and not muddy slopes.
i miss shouting in the outdoors.
but now its diff to even talk in class.
(fiona, im not trying to copy you.
but i feel the same.)
attending the obs course really shuts me from reality too.
away from problems.
nothing to worry about.
its just me,the nature and good friends who had your back.
smiles are all you have to show
and not one frown is returned back at you.
where you can walk freely,
and not have curfews.
nothing, absolutely nothing to worry about.
life's free there.
serious.
the breath of nature.
the cooling breeze.
and the nights spent here at home,
well, issit really home?
cause when i look up to the dark sky,
the moon seems different.
the moon glows brightly in ubin.
and its always been a full moon,
well for all the nights i spent there.
it never seemed so beautiful.
and the stars,
gorgeous.
now all i see are street lights and lampposts.
i dont want that.
where are the straydogs?
where's jackie, our mum, our sister, our evrything but maid?
dang, i miss her.
i miss those shouts of encouragement
and congrats.
there wasnt a single bad talk about you,
not a single negative thing said to you.
it feels great.
and you know whats best?
there wasnt a single vulgarity shouted out to me.
i found that
life is sure wonderful w/o vulgarities
im not used to the luxury of being able to eat and bathe
whenever i want to.
its boring sitting at home,
and not do activities,
doing stuffs that may be my biggest phobia.
but knowing that doing what i fear most would just overcome it.
there's still more to overcome.
together, with a friend or two.
i miss zipping up the tent at night.
sometimes, i do feel myself swaying as if i was rafting w my team.
sometimes too,
i feel like climbing things i see around me,
even though i dont have a harnest which hurts badly down there.
(:
the camp is over.
i love the life there.
but i hope things stay this way.
i hope no more problems come in my way.
but still,
i miss the life there
with a new family, PEGASUS.
but i guess, we have to refreshen our lives again huh?
