Saturday, December 26, 2009 5:05 AM
GRADUATED
 along with gwendolyn, eugene, deon and jia nie
I HAVE OFFICIALLY GRADUATED FROM YVIP 2009
hmm, i dont know if im coming back next year as a
team facilitator
i do want to really focus on my studies,
especially that its my O's next year
ill see how it goes
im sure the rest are seeing how also
even eugene, going through sec 3 which is rather important too
so yeah,
WE ARE PART OF THE YVIP FAMILY
AND WE WILL NEVER ABANDON IT!
(i hope HAHA )
we can even come back the year after next.
AND NEXT YEAR, I STRONGLY ENCOURAGE ALL OF YOU TO PARTICIPATE IN THIS JOURNEY !
IT IS REALLY WORTH YOUR HOLIDAYS!
YOUR DECEMBER HOLIDAY
SING OUR SONG,
UNLOCK YOUR STORY Tuesday, December 22, 2009 5:43 PM
OUT IN THE PAPER
YAYYYY
MY REPORT'S FINALLY OUT IN THE PAPERS!
BERITA HARIAN !
21ST DECEMBER
( so loooong, haha )
PAGE 9
MALAY READERS,
HAVE U READ?!
GO READ !!
HAHAHHAHAHHA
and there's a picture of us too!
this one:
cool or what
HAHA
i wanted to scan it into the computer
but i cant !
im not trying to brag
but its half a whole page
and my scanner's only A4 sized !
i'll take a pict of it and upload it i guess
HAHA
 balloons can really bring happiness
i've tried it,
especially when im down
just twisting it into something,
it increases my happiness level
i love balloons ^^ Friday, December 18, 2009 10:40 PM
what's wrong
 now what's up with you, mum
ive always thought my dad's the only one becoming a monster
but you're changing since the period not long ago,
when u fell out with him .
now both of you are out against me.
becoming more strict and fierce towards me
which only makes me SEEM like becoming worse
issit because u're more afraid of my dad now
cos he feels uve been to lenient on letting me do things
and that he dooesnt like it
do you now want to change
for him,
so that he wont be angry anymore
so that he'll be more contented with you,
especially with the way u handle me?
but what about me..
what about the voice that screams in my heart ?
not only screaming in anger,
but screaming for help.
stop reading my msgs, read or unread by me
stop making me feel like a difficult child to handle
stop saying im not even trying to change
stop saying i care even less of what u ask of me,
im even more scared now
stop saying my (new) friends are influencing me to be a worse son
they are helping me to help you , believe it or not
stop misunderstanding me
stop wronging me
stop expecting me to understand u totally and even more,
but not try to f-ing understand me at all
and that u just want me to go how u want and think MUST be the way
stop not trying to listen to my reasons when u wronged me
and only ending up saying u dont like the way i talk back
or my attitude.
you wronged me.
i was merely trying to explain,
but as usual u just refuse to listen
and stick to ur feelings about me being in the total wrong
i admit ive not been the best child u can have
and ive done quite alot with this new group of friends
like staying out late
(but for dinner,birthday celebration and celebration for end of attachment)
and even having a sleepover once
ive alr reasoned things out to you,
but u still choose to ignore it all.
why, mom
why
stop saying im forever at fault.
u know,
now i feel that ure becoming more of a monster than daddy is..
its terrifying for me do you know
when both of you, parents are strangling me
i rmb the period when u fell out with dad
i could still feel ur love and care for me
i heared u cry on the phone
when we were talking
and u did hear me cry too.
we had our own individual problems.
but since then on,
uve changed.
i dont feel any love from you
in fact,
i feel this slight hatred from you..
i need love
love from a family
frankly,
its been so so SO SO
long since i felt it
both my brother and sister
prefer each other
daddy loves big sister,
very very obvious and biased towards her
mommy loves them all more than she does me
in other words, loves me the least
i dont understand why im most problematic wherever i go
problematic in a sense that
i have alot of problems
and also that i bring alot of problems
this sucks man,
BIG time
it is complete,
the number
but its not with me
but im okay with it,
'cause i know
there's bound to be more glee
Sunday, December 13, 2009 1:20 AM
can i have this dance
 its been weeks
i doubt berita harian is going to publish my report
on our school becoming champions of pushcart challenge `09
anymore
HAISH
i give up waiting
i have better things to look forward to (:
Saturday, December 12, 2009 11:44 PM
virginity
ALHZ
HAS OFFICIALLY LOST HIS SWENSEN'S
VIRGINITY !
LIKE, FINALLY !
HYSTERELLA
celebrated jia yi's birthday(advanced)
at swensen's
personally, i wasnt even sure i was celebrating which one
that its her birthday,
or that it was my first time
after repeated complaints about not being there before
haha,
it was both i guess
i was so happy lah,
kept on repeating and whining,
and shocking people
when i say ive never been to swensens
and now, my new family has brought me there!
woots ! ~
and it really felt like we were a family
i never had this feeling when eating with a group of people before,
never.
neither did gwen
it started with people giving me small portions of their food letting me try
because they really wanted me to have a nice, sweet first time
it was really touching
and soon enough,
the whole table was sharing their food
i only ate a small portion of my dish,
because i kept giving away and eating others'
but it was worth it
i was still full
full in the stomach and felt full of love
oh ya, when we were ordering
i actually cried
some thought that those were tears of joy
but nah..
i felt pathetic
i felt scared
i was only left with 10 bucks,
and i could only afford the ice creams
gwen was very worried
soon, everyone figured that i was crying not bcos i was happy
and got worried too and started asking
gwen than asked my permission
if she could tell the reason for my tears
" aiya no lah,
he just very sad that he dont have enough money.
and not only does he feel embarrassed about it,
he also feels very scared to ask people to borrow him some money.. "
and everone was like
aiya nvm lah!
we treat you the remaining lah!
don't worry!
somemore your first time here,
must have it happy !
and your first time here, the more we want to treat you!
i continued crying cause i felt so loved and cared for
really didnt feel it before
i caught gwen looking at me, smiling
the smile which i know, that she was really happy
and doesnt want to let go of the moment
gwen: (whispers to me)
don't you feel loved here?
never had this feeling before hor?
feels like a family leh.
she also said that she would lend me money
if she had enough
but she only had 15bucks,
and she was worried that she might not have enough too
haha
silly gwen
HYSTERELLA really is a loving family
everyone cares for each other
we haven't quarelled at all
and we say nicely what we dont like about anyone
and now,
everyone's loved
and when we were walking around plaza singapura,
gwen had her arm over my shoulder
hafiz: gwen, i like it when you do this.
i feel loved (:
gwen: huh, really ah?
eh of course i love you what?
hafiz: but idk lah..
you know, u always bully me.
than now u treat me like this,
i can still feel that u still love me as much
even after knowing me for 9 years, going to 10
gwen: hafiz ah, i bully you cos i love you..
and bla3 we went on babbling
i went on home
as some of the few others went to stay over at
yu qi's semi-detached house
HYSTERELLA I LOVE YOU GUYS
and i hope we would never part,
not after our attachment,
not after our afterglow,
not ever.
oh btw, jia yi and sean also said that we are a better group of friends
than their NJC ones
and that's why she chose to celebrate her birthday with us (:
GO HYSTERELLA !
( hysteria + umbrella )
YU QI (BIBI)
KEVIN (BOBO)
SHU MIN
HAFIZ
GWENDOLYN
SEBASTIAN
SEAN
JIA YI
KAMARUL
YING JIE
SHAWN
GORDON
JUN WEI
YIH SIN
WEI LIANG
DEON (CHAN)
\m/_
 and oh,
GWEN
i really love you
and i really hope that our very close friendship never ends
its going to be our tenth year anniversary next year on 2010
let's celebrate that along with our birthday okay!
14 january !
you're uber BOOMZ
\m/_
and pst,
i do still watch the video you made about us sometimes
the one you put slides of our pictures together,
dedicating to me
showing that u love me too,
with the messages you put in
i really appreciate it ^^
'Volunteers don't get paid, not because they are
worthless,
but because they are priceless.' - Ren Ci Hospice - Our Book.
credits: deon's facebook's status Wednesday, December 9, 2009 4:49 AM
posts
 the previous post will officially be the last (very) long post
on SMELLYRAINBOWS.BS.COM
YAY HUH!
HAHA Saturday, December 5, 2009 6:01 AM
YVIP CAMP 2009
 YVIP CAMP ROCKS !
(Youth Volunteer Involvement Programme)
it was, for the first time, combined with with SDSC
(Singapore Disabilities Sports Council)
i SWEAR the camp was boombz!
everything was great!
except for only the food ?
haha
i miss everyone
ive learnt alot too
ive learnt to look out for each other.
ive learnt that people with disabilities can also be like everyone else.
ive learnt that not only do they learn from us,
but we can learn from them too.
there's loads that i learnt.
i cant possibly thank this person enough
she was the one that made it even possible for me to attend this camp
she never gave up trying to help me
even though i missed the whole of day 1
because my dad didnt allow me to attend,
as a punishment for coming home late
this person also spared the time,
though she's VERY busy with the camp
to call me and pick up my calls
to discuss how to get me to attend the camp
she was even the one to speak to my dad over the phone,
succeeding in convincing him to allow me to attend the camp
she did a great deal for me,
though she was already VERY VERY busy,
and barely have time for herself,
even calling me during her break
that person is,
HUI BIN
im really grateful to you hui bin
hope you like the balloon flower i made for you on the way to
ORIENTUS RESORT (campsite)
i know its nothings, compared to what u have done for me
and im also very apologetic if ive been a burden
and i know ive been very troublesome,
causing u so much trouble when ure busy enough
im really sorry
and thanks again ! ^^
ahh, cant take hui bin enough
& thanks for the hug on the last day!
and sorry for wetting ur shoulder with me tears ><
the next group of people i would like to is my team facilitators, KEVIN AND YU QI
kevin has shown cared towards us i also owe him a big thank you for he actually sacrificed his bed for me i came late, only on the second day out of the four days of the camp and it kinda messed up the rooming list they put me in kevin's room he had to sleep on the floor in his sleeping bag ahh, feel so bad T.T
some of us in group 4(umbrella) also got him in trouble not once at that ): we're sorry kevin hope you like the "WE LOVE YOU,KEVIN" tag with a msg at the back though it was made out of simple cardboard hope you appreciate it that was all we had ):
and yu qi, though he isnt really my group's facilitator, he did a great deal also since both our groups were in the same mass group did alot of things tgt im even confused who's in which group haha
but who cares
group 3: hysteria
group 4: umbrella
group 3&4 mass group : hysterella !
haha
so yeah, yu qi
he was very caring as well
very patient
and nice
and funny
and a backstabber!
he wore other group's identity!
haha kidding
he's still ours
HAHA
and it was sweet that he said " i love you" to us all after campfire
on the last night
it was very difficult for him to say it
because he only said it to his mom
awww
we kinda psycho-ed him to say it
okay fine, it was me HAAH
hafiz : yu qi, its the last night.
do you love us ):
he didnt reply
hafiz : (sighs deeply) hais, hysterella..
you see, someone doesnt love us
haiya...
(the rest giggled, yu qi too)
and then kevin came
hafiz: kevin..
do you love us?
kevin: yeah, of course?
why?
hafiz : well, someone else doesnt..
haiyaaa.. we so sad u know..
some others: ya lo.. hais..
yu qi: hey, who says i dont..
err
err
(stutters)
hafiz: haiyaaa.. nvm lah yu qi..
if you dont want to say it, we wont force you.. we understand..
yu qi: no no..
must sincere mah..
i...
love...
...
you...
(blushes)
everyone was aww-ing and laughing lah
such a sweet moment
^^
KEVIN AND YU QI
YOU BOTH HAVE UNLOCKED MY STORY
AND ALSO THAT OF HYSTERELLA'S
so thank you once again
and not forgetting
HYSTERELLA!
YOU GUYS WERE GREAT PEOPLE!
EACH AND EVERYONE OF YOU!
thanks for mingling with me, though i came late
and it might be awkward for you guys
i felt very awkward when i first came,
didnt know anyone much
but you guys opened up to me
and warmed me up
so yeah,
I LOVE YOU AND THANKS SO SO MUCH !
^^
can't wait for attachment!
where we can finally give our volunteering services!
oh FYI,
eugene, gwen, deon and jia nie
are involved in this camp too
but we're all in different groups
but gwen's in yu qi's group
so we get to go tgt often
see you guys on monday for attachment !
------------------------------------------------------------------
(on the same day)
cabbed home with jia nie, eugene and gwen after camp
the taxi driver was DAMN annoying
jia nie: (trying to be friendly and funny)
uncle, its raining,
drive carefully okay? *smiles)
driver: you shouldnt say that, how can you.
its not right to say this kind of things to me.
i know what to do,
dont tell me what to do.
and blar2
and then he
blar3
and he moved on to other topics,
about duties of a women
lah dk what shit
VERY VERY LONG
from serangoon to jurong east NON-STOP
he also said in chinese that a girl , if not related to a guy,
should be very close(physically)
gwen figured that he was actl talking abt us both cause we were busy camwhoring at the back
but we didnt care
i was camwhoring with gwen ,
using it as a distraction to not get annoyed by the driver
you know how easily annoyed i get
if i had listened to him throughout,
im just afraid my attitude would come out again
i dont want that to happen
jia nie was his target
he talked and talked and talked
and jia nie, tired enough
had to listen
she soon got pissed also
she felt that he didnt make sense at some points
and when she tried to rebut
the driver raised his voice even higher that of jia nie's
and said that she doesnt understand him
like psh?
he's the one who doesnt want to understand her
she's trying okay
and he said,
she'll understand when she grows up
wadde?
it started to rain
and got noisy
jia nie was even more pissed
trying to strain her ears to try and listen to him
she finally burst out
( in an annoyed tone )
when he was still in the midst of talking
" uncle can we drop this topic.
its raining and i cant hear you "
driver: cannot hear me?
( than stopped talking. )
and it was peace
haha
got home
quickly got ready
for balloon sculpturing
yet another event of making balloon sculptures for public
this time, for lucky draw
AT the cinemas haha
at gv vivocity
after so,
we got two free movie tickets
movie marathon, i should say
twilight and twilight saga(new moon)
the first one starts at 9pm
but we only stayed for twilight (i know, loser hor)
but jia nie and i had to go home,
and somehow the rest wanted too
especially that it was already late at night
and transport was a matter
my my
was it a suay day or what !
jurongvillians were all late for balloon
mr wong's face was black
eugene had a rough time on the phone with his mom
when he called to ask whether she could send us home after the movies
bcos it would be very late at night
gwen, for the first time,
decided to inform her mom on her whereabouts
trying to be a nicer daughter
but ends up being ticked off by her dad
i got ticked off also by mom
cos i tried to stay for the second movie
eugene went away from all of us
(gwen, jia nie, ming sian and i)
we feared that it was going to be the last train
and we were very worried about him
esp when he texted jia nie
" where are you guys"
jia nie called him and asked where he was
all of us very worried
he didnt want to say
we went out of the train, feeling scared
the doors were closing
and we tried to get back into the train
only jia nie made it in time
the doors close and she looked so scared
as the train passed by, gwen say eugene in the same train as we were
and we went out for ??
luckily, it wasnt the last train
but unfortunately,
THAT was the last train.
it only brought us to harbourfront
and then on, we're stuck about gg home
i started crying
cause the day was really very rough
and things still arent okay between my parents,
i was very worried
and eugene was mad at me
and and we didnt know what to do
jia nie dropped her wallet somewhere
headed back to look for it
everyone was alr stressed then
eugene also started crying not long after
we all didnt know why
took a bus
dropped,
flagged a cab
man,
it was raelly a rough day
gwen was dragged in also
my battery was flat,
and my mom contacted me through gwen's phone
obviously she wouldnt be pleased about that
esp when she's using pre-paid
im really sorry gwen ):
but luckily she was okay not long after
ming sian was the ony one without a problem that day
haha
he was in the cab filled with stressed people
jia nie, gwen, eugene and i
he must have been very worried huh
reached home at about 1am
wow?
for me that is |
