i'll take you high up soaring into the skies just take my hand & close your eyes . (?)
addition to previous post :
DRILLS
we were standing there at the parade square in a squad messy and not so straight under the scorching sun and clouds who at least helped by moving along, covering the sun as they go
" WATCH YOUR FRONT .
BAND ! SEDI... - AH ! "
" up check ! "
" KEKANAN.. LU...RUS !"
" turn 2, 3, 4 ,halt ! "
we straightened our rows.
" PANDANG KE HADAPAAAAN PAAN...DANG ! "
" up ! "
we were then standing in a squad so straight and smart with two feet spacing away from each other
we stood in sedia position, not allowed to move
its funny to know that the sun can be our best friend yet an enemy. it just depends on where you are or how you're feeling .
on that day, it was our enemy.
we were standing there in attention waiting for the next command
suddenly i felt something crawling on my leg something small a creepy crawlie !
i dont know which kind, wasnt allowed to move my head and look . i tried to shake my legs abit , not making it obvious, but it stayed put .
i gave up shaking, thinking if i dont disturb it, maybe it wont to me.
so i just stood there
seconds later, it seemed to make its way up my legs, i panicked. i wanted to ask for permission to adjust myself but was afraid the other might think i was joking and start laughing .
i stayed put
asyiqin was in front of me i whispered to her the situation i could see her giggle ( i think) those near me heard me too, and they giggled as well oops hahah
boy was i GLAD! i could move my legs and the bug was gone WHOOHOO i told asyqin so and i saw her cheek widen as she smiled
moments later, when we were in sedia postition again, i felt it again. but this time, it was on my arm gosh
endurance test ah ? hmph
LAST DAY OF 2008 .
head to vivo with deon and zeke gahh its been so long since i saw that muscular guy.
hmph and i dont like standing beside both of them. (shortest , ugh ) plus zeke has grown taller now which makes me EVEN shorter
hafiz : " gosh is this the maximum height im going to grow? "
deon : " no lah"
that guy sure nottttt.... i dont want to be a short guy ):
oggay back to topic
zeke and deon wanted to get themselves new school bags for the new start of school .
aiyo those two boys ah.. actually i spotted a few nice bags which suit them (esp deon) but then they didnt seem to agree w me.
aiyo just get a simple bag lah. so many simple bags yet nice but they didnt want .
i was talking bout this white kappa bag and suddenly some guy took it and wanted to buy it. ? and it was the last piece pfft !
aiya if they didnt get it, i doubt zeke or deon would even think of getting it .
the only thing they got from vivo city is a canned drink each from the vending machine in pet shop . how pathetic can it get
we looked at the dogs & puppies and hamsters
we then sat at the rooftop for awhile and strummed on MY NEW guitar okay i shall say it again, MY- NEW-GUITAR hohoho
so yea that's bout it i guess .
oh oh kak ifa ( my bro's girlfriend ) and kak ika ( my cousin ) came over to my crib that night
we went out for dinner as a family with kak ifa ( kak ika had to meet up w her guy sigh )
kak ifa is super fun ! so funny hahah
we were waiting for a cab when kak ifa said " aiya no taxi lah , all go town cause NYU NYE wad"
kak ika & i : " nyu nye???"
EVERYONE BURST OUT LAUGHING as she tried to hide her embarrassment haha so cute
so uhm
HAPPY NYU NYER EVELI BOLI ! haha
gosh its january 01 2009 ! i havent thought bout my new year resolutions eh haha let me ponder over it alright ? maybe the next post i write ?
im sad yet glad 2008 is over
the sweet memories shall be kept and the sour shall all be gone.
its time to reflect on the year past and contemplete on the year coming .
once again, HAPPY NYU NYE .
gahh can't wait for january 14 . gwen's and my day .
Tuesday, December 30, 2008 5:18 AM
band
last night's sleep was most annoying ever
i tossed and turned it was 1am
i put on my blanket it soon got hot i took it off then cold it soon got
my legs were sweating right down to my feet was the conditions just uncomfortable or was i simply worried for today
either way, it didnt feel nice.
i opened my eyes and looked up to the wall clock it wrote 2am
gahh my bedtime is getting longer by the day & the thing is, SCHOOL'S STARTING i dont want it to become a habit
i dont want to enter into school with half-band uniform (w/o tie and school shoes instead) looking like a zombie .
well who wants to its the first day of school . first few days of school . a new start .
okay enough let's talk bout today.
BAND.
we reported for attendance taking at 7.45 am.
went through flying high to prepare for the afternoon when mrs chee would come.
mrs chia said that there were a few improvements. woots
lunch at 11.30 went to kfc my dad gave us free pizza whoohoo!
after an hour's break, we gathered back and everyone was anxiously yet hardworking-ly (if that's even a word. take it as it is) worked on the parts on flying high.
i could somehow feel the tension in everyone hearts beating fast and deep
timpani wasn't any easy. my solo especially . i tried playing over and over again, sweating in an air-conditioned room.
it just seems so difficult.
somehow soon, i seem to get the hang of it.
moments later,
" BAND STAND.
BAND GREET MRS CHEE"
"gooooood moooorniiiingg mrs cheee" (grags words like everyone else does )
mrs chia was nowhere to be found. did she have something on on the very last minute?
mrs chee went through SELECTIONS FROM GREASE for next year's sec one orientation. we played with gimmicks the second time around.
after so we played NEW YEAR GREETINGS mrs ang said that she wanted us to perform on CHINESE NEW YEAR like wth? it sounds super wierd and funny and stupid of us, a concert band to be playing a chinese-orchestra-like piece? gosh?
but at least it proves to show that we can play CO's type of songs but they cant play ours? HOHO
mr chua took over.
we went down for drills?
err? hello? flying high???
we worked on our marching. yeah we did improve. so proud ov JVCB ! whoohoo
and i got my turn of using the mace to lead ! hahah okaylah even only once it still felt great hahah
soon it was four
everyone started asking amongst themselves
" flying high? "
shaffiqa, some others and i think that maybe mrs chee didnt want us to try flying high out and sent us for drills. sigh we wont know whats on her mind lah.
just glad to hear sery saying that we will still play for her soon.
Monday, December 29, 2008 5:38 AM
judgement day
band tomorrow aka JUDGEMENT DAY
the day we're going to play for mrs chee FLYING HIGH gahh im scared and worried we're actually playing that grade 4-5 piece to her
my greatest fear is if i suddenly break down and mess up my 'solos'
the timpani roll which brings the music to the second movement. gahh ive yet to master that. still abit rusted
and the quaver 'solos' (okay lah it didnt state 'solo' on my score but noone's playing right? so yea) that one can play lah but what if i break down? gosh
okay, deep breaths...
tag replies :
syaifullah: WEI! its not really cleaner okay! aiyo i feel so insulted ahha but quick money right !
shaffiqa : hoho boy, yes i do.. hehehehheheheheh
12:19 AM
jason mraz
gahh jason mraz is so cute haha he actually messed up his own lyrics to Live High live in Montreal
starting with the second verse instead of the first
HAHA ITS A MUST WATCH
gahh
lyrics :
I try to picture a girl Through a looking glass See her as a carbon atom See her eyes and stare back at them See that girl As her own new world Though a home is on the surface, she is still a universe
Glory God, oh God is peeking through the blinds Are we all here standing naked Taking guesses at the actual date and time Oh my, justifying reasons why Is an absolutely insane resolution to live by
Live high Live mighty Live righteously Takin it easy Live high, live mighty Live righteously
Try to picture the man To always have an open hand See him as a giving tree See him as matter Matter fact he's not a beast No not the devil either Always a good deed doer And it's laughter that we're makin after all
The call of the wild is still an ordination why And the order of the permeates All our politics are too late Oh my, the congregation in my mind Is this assembly singing gratitude Practicing their loving for you
Just take it easyAnd celebrate the malleable reality Nothing is ever as it seems This life is but a dream
Sunday, December 28, 2008 11:34 PM
kerja kendarat
my cousin here, syafiq, just asked me if i would like to work with him.
at first i felt lazy to work. but after hearing it was easy money and his sister, my sister and another cousin of mine wanted the job too, i decided to try it out as well.
its what the malays say " kerja kendarat " its like, on the malays marriage occasion, there are people who carry the plates and cups to the washing area when the guests are done.
and its quick money. 50 bucks per day. and working days are only on sundays, the day when malays get married .
i mean, its easy money what right
u ask if the guests are done,
pick up their plates and cups if they are,
wipe the table with a cloth,
bring them to the washing area and
u dont even have to wash them
how tough can it get?
besides we've done it a few times before when our own cousins got married.
so i guess it shouldnt be so tough huh?
yay!
and this way, i can easily pay sery for the guitar she's selling to me! 60 bucks! plus the bag! whoohoo! and i like her guitar sound. gahhh
i wanna practise hard. if i can play it well, i wish i can perform on next year's graduation party just like zany, shaffiqa, sery (as a group) & khair (solo) did this year. whoohoo anybody wanna sing? hahahah
let's see, if i get 50 bucks per week... (assuming we go everyweek & i have nothing that clashes)
then .. gahh (drools)
ohbtw, ive tasted the chocolate bubble yum! okay what! i dont know why everyone else says it tastes like rubber as the flavour fades. hmph you guys dont know chocolate like i do. CHEH! ANYHOW ONLY haha but seriously, i think its not bad. i dont mind chewing on another one haha
people whom i intended to give gum to but ran off before i could do so:
- zany
- adila
- sery
these people, meet me after band.
band dismissed .
(aww i miss saying that. i miss hearing anyone saying that even) haha
OH BAND PEEPS. IF YOU HAPPEN YO PASS BY MY BLOG,
PLEASE BE REMINDED THAT TOMORROW'S ATTIRE ISYELLOW BAND TEE.
REPORT AT7.45SHARP. (i'll be waiting at the door taking down names of latecomes hoho) SO DONT BE LATE
whohoo! we're playing flying high for mrs chee! i hope she lets us play that for SYF !
10:51 PM
family of five
went to jp2 for the secone time the other day & this time, it was with my family didnt really feel like a close family anymore actually.
my mum and dad would sit on the seat at the bus stop, chatting about who-knows-what and my brother and sister would be at one side of the bus stop and i would be at the other
my parents would walk side by side my siblings too i would be either at the back, front or middle either way it doesnt matter.
i walked alone.
i tried to walk beside my brother and a passerby suddenly came rushing towards me i had to move nearer to my brother to make way for him little did i know he said that i was annoying and was trying to squeeze in with him and my sister ???? sigh
i then went behind the rest and had nothing but these eyes which i wished could just capture moments like a camera could like shaffiqa dreamed off and also contact lens which she imagined could just work like a camera ( eh shaffiqa. you're featured too hah)
so yea. why did my parents stop at three children. can i have a younger sibling? one that i can actually talk to if im facing any problems? then i wouldn't have caused anyone else the trouble of listening to my whinings.
no, maybe i should ask this way why was i even born anyways and just add the burden to the family to the people around me
there'd be one less noisy dude one less annoying guy
one less who would cause harm and hurt to the world one less who would cause troubles, problems, conflicts
wouldn't there be more happiness and merry?
okay hafiz stop it
why am i getting emo shit suddenly haha lame pork! silly goose. stupid babboon.
okay.
end of post.
oh btw what a sad lonely christmas it was this year. they wished me a merry christmas but it didnt seem to be merry at all ..
5:55 AM
number one fan
this girl here,
SYAZWANI BINTE SONARSONO
is da bomb yaw !
she wrote a song with her friend not long ago entittled 'our song'
that song is simply superb! guess what, ive memorised the lyrics! ahha
im so proud of zany and zul. their song is getting popular now! WHOOHOO!
eh eh!
im her NUMBER ONE FAN! RIGHT ZANY !
muahahha i have the original copy of the drafting of that song! WHOOHOO! ( oops, zany. you know what happened right? hehhe shush !)
tag replies :
zany : yes! lion king! cool right, omg thats my favourite part of the song! HAHAHHA
shaffiqa : HELLO HELLO HELLO
naz : OKAY! be sure to tell me! haha
5:06 AM
wz
listen
im sorry for being such a nuisance in your life
im sorry for bugging you when your status wrote 'away' as far as i know, if you didnt want to talk or be bothered, you'd appear offline. i didnt know it goes the same if you were 'away' ?
Besides, its not always you appear online. if only you'd said you didnt feel like talking. i could have sworn i wouldn't have disturbed you any longer, which caused you to dislike or get annoyed by me further.
im sorry for bugging you in class, with texts you didnt really want to reply. i should have known you dont like to be disturbed when you're in class. sorry
im sorry for hinting at you to take me to sentosa(my class outing) when i didnt know how to get there. im sorry that those hints somehow made you uncomfortable. again, you should have told me.
im sorry for being a hypocrite in your eyes before. ive explained on this but i guess its okay if you cant help but to feel so. i cant do anything to change it can i
im sorry for taking things for granted & thinking you were ever my best friend when you didnt even really like me from the start.
why, ive been wondering? someone told me before that because he treated me as a bro better than he did to you, you didnt really like me then.
was it since then that you disliked me. forget it, it doesnt even matter anymore.
i only treated you as a bestfriend. i didnt ask you to do the same?
im sorry for kb-ing your dearly loved ones that evening which initially made you not want to go to the movies. i didnt really intend to kb them but to only reason out my unhappiness
frankly, i had second thoughts on going to the cinemas too but i didnt let my anger get the better of me i didnt want to regret not going, knowing it may be the last time i'd see you.
And i never regret it. it was the last time i saw you. it may be so , but ive been keeping that ticket in my wallet & ill always will.
im sorry for posting my feelings w/o thinking all this while. A blog is an online diary & i only felt that diaries are where one pours everything out. forgive me for the posts that have affected you. i should have thought about your feelings
no, not only you, but.. i guess i brought it upon myself huh i believe that that post blew it all & ended things between him and i
im not done just yet my greatest apologies lie here
im sorry for badmouthing & cursing you i told myself to hate you & find every means to do so. i thought hatred would really finally allow me to let go of you, let go of the past &forget everything that had ever happened between the both of us and move on w/o anything pulling me back.
but it proved me wrong
and frankly, i did get unsatisfied when you first said that all you wanted was justice
i didnt see the sense of fairness before and i didnt see why you deserve it more than i do now
and i dont see why you'd care and be worried if everyone else in my clique would leave you but me
flashbacks & conversations like 'the guitar trio' & you agreeing to teach me to swim or sing to me just appear every now and then
but im glad only sweet memories seem to come back even though u didnt really keep your words but good riddance to all the sour
ive finally realised that by doing all this bad stuff it would just remind me of the sour which i took so long to get over. now it has all come back..
i should have known that it was good enough before this i could move on easier, with nothing but the happiness from you before. with that and a little pixie dust, i could have flown.
the only thing needed left was time
i dont want any hatred to go on any longer im glad i was once given a change to be your friend & im so fortunate to have caught HSM3 in cinemas with you
thank you so much for everything & once again, im sorry.
al-hafiz , aka , (former) ali-baba
Thursday, December 25, 2008 5:10 AM
stupid bug
basketball sometimes makes us four empty.
i was lying down on my matress moments ago, watching Don't Forget The Lyrics when a STUPID BUG tried to make its way through my left ear ! stupid stupid bug. i could feel its tiny little legs moving and hear the buzzing sound it made.
eek!
i jumped up as my bro looked at me wondering why i did so and my sis who shouted along (cause she hates creepy crawlies/insects too)
disgusting right?
i wonder if there are any eggs laid inside my ear. omg, NO!
at least this experience isnt as bad as the time a cockroach crawled over my face when i was lying down! ugh
i seriously got a phobia of cockroach since then.
tag replies:
fiona : okay okay i wont! haha i say ready mah i wont be using.
what nobody care? you planned the movie thing. then i waited for updates then you never get back. like the confirmed show and when. everytime i plan one, your turn lah .
naz : omg zie tagged me! i miss you i miss you i miss you i miss you ! when you coming back!?@ we so gotta chill out !
ahdila : alamak really ah? oh shit. ala nehmind lah. just eat lah, buy ready mah. haha i wonder how the others are gonna react when they taste rubber! HOHO
elena : hmm im not quite sure eh. i think i picked it up from reading fiona's posts! HAHA! oh oh! maybe it's cause i love you guys so i use 'my' to show you guys are mine . should be lah
shireen : hello! thanks for the tag! but im kinda lazy to link now hehhe
Wednesday, December 24, 2008 5:31 AM
(pretend i post this on the stroke of 12 on 25th december?
MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ONE AND ALL !
12:13 AM
christmas eve
i miss my gwen. i miss my fiona i miss my deon.
& not forgetting my elena & my zeke badly.
it's christmas eve and everyone else seems to be busy going out and leading their own lives.
im stuck at home w/ nobody to go out with.
plans of finding fluffy was cancelled cause gwen had two reasons:
1. She's feeling down . her mum is giving away her four hamsters & says that she has to follow her to bring it to her shengsiong colleague.
2. she feels lazy . (why ask in the first place)
so yea, im stuck at home alone with my sleeping grandmum,
left with nothing but this wide screen , this rectangular black & grey keyboard , this mouse which is slightly smaller than my palm size, & this chair which i think the wheels have rusted abit (it cant seem to wheel around as smoothly) in this small messy room , listening to band songs on imeem and then lion king's and other nice songs on youtube .
oooh, the pict at the start my post works well as a blog skin pict huh? should i? nah... (i have my reasons as to why hehhe)
oh gahh my grandmum just opened up my bedroom door and said
" im going to cik amy's house. if anyone knocks on the door, do not open. it could be mas selamat" (and closes back the door)
(opens again and continued)
"they still looking for mas selamat. so dont open. it may be him"
aiyoyoyoyo
gahh THE GRINCH is so irritating, the cute-adorable-kind of irritating ! he's great
tag reply:
syaifullah : i know, isnt it?
Tuesday, December 23, 2008 9:54 PM
gahh i just realised i ever signed up on facebook!
hahah atiqah! happy ? you keep pestering me to sign up on facebook !
im still working on it, will tell you details once its done.
gosh, now i gotta update both friendster and facebook
tag replies :
shaffiqa : where got typical girl? typical girls would put like, aiya got lah. yours isnt that kind haha really.
elena : yes yes deon! tag her! she misses you! hahahha im serious. she does
5:45 AM
half-uniform
GAHHH
SCHOOLS STARTING NEXT FRIDAY. (i just got in the mood of holidays!)
and and! oh man, im not used to wearing band's half-uniform around .
WOAH WAIT ! am i really taking DNT !?@ nooooo ): why can't there be art in express stream!@? PFFT !!! can i appeal?
dont think so.. even if its possible, i guess its too late?
ugh, time to rack my brains when school starts. and i wont be so free after school huh. with the tough coursework given
i want art !!!
& i think i prefer taking f&n to d&t ): but chinyee says its the best for our future, since we couldnt get art
oh man!
4:58 AM
bubble gum
not gonna post much really. just wanna say i just came back from johore.
dang, the... (eh whats it called ah?) nevemind. the place you chop your passport to enter malaysia right, at malaysia one hahah has changed siol . so new. but its kinda too hmm (insert word, again)
they made it like it was an airport. very spacious and kinda empty and there was a travellator? hahha and the thing is, its very short. like the 30 feet away only? i think. im no good at measurements haha
and i got bubble yum ! like FINALLY ! ive been craving for it recently.
oh oh! there's this new cool flavour. chocolate! AND ITS HERSHEY'S !!!!! gahhh favourite
wait, on second thought, is it nice to chew chocolate? (eek?) and and blowing it up into a bubble? gulp. ive yet to try. gonna try it w some peeps on friday's band practise!
ciao ~
tag replies :
hannah : not really. haha who told you?
ahdila : aww, kakak ahdila! hahha it still sounds wierd. eh eh! remember in band room, someone said somthing during warm-up & you turned to me and we looked at each other. hahah okay, noone understands but us. woohoo a secret shared ! ;B
zany : (: hahah
deon bro : yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo ! u finally tagged again ! aiyoo its been so long since you tagged haha !
shaffiqa : miss you miss you too! why uh? we just had band practise last monday what ah it doesnt matter. i also miss you haha. FRIDAY WE SHALL MEET ! MUUUUUUAAAuahahhahah
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ i miss elena i miss zeke. we actually havent met up for two months. ):
\
Monday, December 22, 2008 5:44 AM
enough
i dont want to blame anyone anymore i admit, i did put on too much high hopes , knowing its worthless. and i was over-desperate. for what?
fool.
i really want to forget everything. everything just done. over. gone. if only people stop mentioning anything related anyhow. it'll just bring more misery if i were to be reminded of the sour.
im having enough problems with mrs gan, and i dont want to add to the grief.
oh yeah, mrs gan.
gahh, am i getting what i really deserve? am i really such that kinda leader, the one she made me out to be?
frankly, im lost in this area. noone's guiding me. i do want to talk to/confide in sery at times, well she would understand right?
but she's been down these days. i dont want to trouble her. and make her even more stressed, having to think of something for me.
actually, i kinda feel scared talking to her nowadays too. dont ask, im unsure myself as to why
and im also afraid she might be disapointed in me i know shes disappointed in me at HK.
buthas all these scoldings and repeated 'threats' from mrs gan made it worse?
i do want sery to be proud of me. & if i do make it and take over her next year, i want her to pass down that red sash , slinging it over my shoulder with such pride and honour.
guess i just gotta sacrifice more of my free time after band time more often.
there was band today, ended at 12. we headed to deon's crib and i got home kinda late. 1830?
my mum nearly called up mrs gan. that was such SUCH a close shave. mrs gan has given me a strong warning and my post would be stripped off just like that if it happened again.
gahhh phew double phew
i never thought that i'd catch this lovebug again
gahh i know it wont happen. or maybe... nah, impossible i guess?
i gotta make it to be just an infactuation !
5:07 AM
POE
then you came, and you changed my whole world now
ive heard what you had to say. i think whatever we've said or got to say has to end here . let's put a stop to all this nonsense, both of us trying to justify ourselves.
it doesnt end, does it . i start, you respond. vice versa.
whats the point. we both had our flaws & mistakes(let's not mention) enough about this goddamn mistake.
this wrangle isnt going anywhere. esp when we both have our own sides and we so dont have the chance to clear things out and it's so not my fault it is so
you lead your own life, fiona and i lead ours. dont even bother asking if she hates you. isnt it obvious enough? duh. just pretend we never met ( which im sure we're both are very good at now)
nothing happened between us. not the sour we both know very well about & not the nice even. im sure fiona has had enough too.
retribution has struck me
(& at least syai and i could clear things out. he was his first yet he didnt stay mad at me .i didnt get mad at you or disliked you once. but who would expect that instead, hmph forget it)
& i swear it will befall you. even not, im sure it wont be as smooth-sailing as you expect it to be.
oh oh btw, fiona and i feel uncomfortable w some of your words too, trust me. simply disturbing.
"which guy would talk like that".
well, look who's talking.
it ends here.
Saturday, December 20, 2008 6:03 AM
HE
i close my eyes & the flashback starts
i miss playing DDR with the pro
i miss percussion tutorings with the blur
frankly, i have to admit. i miss the bickerings though.
well.. haha
there's no use griefing huh
& i should be so darn thankful that i was once given the chance to be someone special. *gives a genuine smile*
though its done and over, there's no harm reminiscing right? well the happy stuffs that is.
gah, thanks zany ! :D for introducing chris chrocker's videos. yeah you're right. once you watch his videos then like very interesting hahah and he does makes alot of sense.
darn those people who make fun of him !
tag replies :
rita : aiya! stupid act paikia-s. hmph there better be cool ones!
ahdila : oh man. i kinda miss you too. hahaha i somehow miss cracking jokes and laughing crazily with you. hello? it'd just been a few days back we laughed together, and oh, got scolded together. haha nevermind. BAND'S COMING! WOOHOO
isk :eh dont need lah. i understand you're very busy. especially with your band huh. aiya aiming for gold mah that guy? haha with honours at that !
hahahha
zany :unfortunately, yes. well its not that super duper ugly till my eyes hurt. UGH OKAY, IT IS! well only because of the bloody red big font which writes "concert band" big-ly . aiyoyo aiyo when there's band you go check it out lah
Friday, December 19, 2008 11:25 PM
jvcb
i miss band. its been about a week w/o it now. i miss making music. i miss the people. i miss laughing hysterically. i miss talking non-stop. i miss the whole bunch of cool black or banana-is yellow conquering the whole of kfc. i miss my instrument. i miss timpani. i miss percussion. (i miss french horn)
aiya all this not as important.
i miss music most. i dont think i want to join a military band anymore. i rather focus on music. im glad we arent as active in drills or our music wouldnt have been labeled as musical (by guest conductor) .
i love jvcb. GO JVCB!
let's bring back a gold!
at least a silver again ? getting another silver shows we improved? well, competition gets harder every year, if we hadn't improved we wouldnt get silver again? we would have gotten bronze or even certificate of participation(COP) .
so yea, GO JVCB.
i cant wait for december 22 for make-up band practise to work on flying high.
tag replies :
syaifullah : muahahahhah
5:55 AM
wierd
it's wierd to know that both wierd and weird may look right .
12:04 AM
drum major
what we want is someone matured . we have to re-look into you .
it just sucks that its all not appreciated / noticed. who says im the type who dont put in effort in what i do.
one noticeboard could actually beat all the effort ive put in. its no doubt all the efforts before weren't noticed .
im just so glad at least mrs chia appreciates . it was for the jamiyah home visit. only she seems to appreciate and show that she is.
frankly, i feel more determined to work harder when she praised me and had the sec ones applaud for me.
mrs gan said that the more criticism the better. so one can know his or her flaws and work on them
but does it really work?
personally, i think both praises and criticisms are needed. but so far, its heavy on one side for me. you know whats pulling me down
and if she thinks that way, i dont see why some people dont get her criticisms. she said it herself noone is perfect. then what reason is there for leaving some people out?
and i remember i was told to cut my hair. and that i had to set an example if i were to take charge of discipline (attire) in the band. i know of one guy who has much longer hair on his head . but you never once said anything. even if you do, i bet you'd say it nicely and not in a serious manner.
the thing is he actually was asked to check the other guys' hair on the first morning of HK trip ( at the concourse before leaving ) ?
LOOK PEOPLE! HE HAS THE LONGEST HAIR (guys) IN THE BAND !
why? issit just cause he's hot? he's handsome? and its a waste if u ask him to cut his hair and he really does?
what happened to equality people? fairness too
i look around and wonder why everyone else is more liked. i can really put in more you know. but i wasnt really given the chance to.
for instance, HK trip. i was not called out ONCE to help. i wanted to take initiative but what else are there to be done? everyone has taken over.
and when i dont do anyting (which i really didnt know what to) im said to be childish and playful and not helping out.
(?)
the jamiyah home visit was so far the biggest task given to me. and i foolishly thought thay through that, i could be at least abit more liked, abit more of a person whom they can put more confidence in.
but it didnt seem like so.
but i shall not be the loser i was. who kept thinking of giving up after given a few (okay, alot) of criticisms.
im going to set my thinking straight. giving up is NOT an option.
mrs gan is right. i gotta improve on my flaws. go beyond the sore feeling and think hard .
i know that someday, i can prove to them im not irresponsible or someone they can't put confidence in or give big tasks like handling the whole band .
i'll prove that im not what they've been thinking i am. prove that i can be better, good enough to be their drum major and lead the band. im not only doing this for myself but for the band. i want to elad the band well and let it soar to greater heights (okay wait, is that too big?) nevermind.
but i just hope someday will come .
tag replies :
shaffiqa :err i dont know what to say too. well err,, you silly goose?
Thursday, December 18, 2008 10:22 PM
gahh
november 17th 2008
went to SINGAPORE POLY SYMPHONIC BAND'S(SPSB) concert. it started at 7.30 pm at VICTORIA CONCERT HALL dang , was it grand.
i swear it was worth my 12 bucks. Gold Band, dudes . and of course w my wonderful seniors in it, tiac woo,wen xiang and janice (rofl )
okay, why was i pouting. i so wasnt ready. darn you zany !
hafizany. zany and i agreed that we did look compatible, FOT THAT DAY. haha deon lah, started it. saying we looked compatible haha
shaffiqa brought her shades cause it was already in her bag. i brought it cause she brought it. she didnt really used them, cause fiona and zany kept lending from her haha and i didnt really use mine either. picts, yes ahhah
the concert started at 1930. shaffiqa and deon came over to my crib at 1500. i helped him choose his bottom. we watched japanese game shows on youtube for awhile before meeting fiona under my block.
met up w the rest of the band who went at 1700, at JE interchange.
ugh, i actually believed zany was gg to appear in tubes and shorts. how dumb can i get.
SP band's music was simply awesome. we sat in awe, speechless. (aiyaa still got talk lah) i swear our band is nowhere nowhere near them. is our band bad or are they simply good?
i shant say our band is no good, okay what silver band? good enough lo haha its just that SPSB's plain good.
*sticks our tongue, acting cute-thinking i make sense*
OH OH! JOHNY BRAVO PLAYS THE TUBA !!!
On the way home in the subway, there was this guy who stopshot, with his arms opened at the end of the escalator. he reminded me of KUDA KEPANG. i was w zany. we were both scared, nearing the end of the escalator glad he didnt attack or whatsoever phew
ended ard 2230 reached home at appx. 2330
end of day.
november 18th 2008
just when i thought i could sleep in late cause i reached home pretty late the night before. little did i know, or did adila, we got woken up BY MRS GAN SEOK JEAN. ugh and it was ard 8 plus PFFT
i woke up w baggy eyes & saw these texts.
mrs gan: "why is the noticeboard not up yet? must get it done by today!"
(cause next year's sec ones are coming on november 19th, the next day)
adila: "hafiz, i apologise first if that gun is gg to scold you today. she just asked my why is it not up today and i really dont know what the hell she wants ah.
adila:" can u meet me in sch? im really sorry."
Before i could reply any of them,
mrs gan: " did you see the noticeboard? its so badly done! why didnt you oversee to ensure its done properly? No hk picts, put other picts ! Dont leave it blank! You have to help her to do it by today! "
i got calls at the so-wrong time. when i was bathing! how the hell was i gg to pick up. and when i wasnt in the room w my phone. i put my phone in silent. i dont have caller id. adila said it wasnt her. confirm mrs gan, and i bet she thinks i purposely avoid her calls out of guilt. i could feel it.
adila and i met up at 1000 at kodak , a stone throw away from sch. printed pictures and got to work. we stayed for like, 7 hours? from 11 to 6 . to work on the noticeboard.
we initially finished at 4/5. called up mrs gan, to tell her we're done and asked her to check. we thought she might be happy it was finally done, AFTER HOURS OF HARD WORK but we got more scoldings instead. life's hard huh.
i forgot what she told adila but what she scolded me?
she was disappointed i didnt oversee the noticeboard's progress ( actually, i did ) she asked me if i did, i said abit.
( i mean really, i did check as in text adila all the time. i only didnt go to sch w her to do it. i had matters at home that day she went. wasn't that at least PART of overseeing? i checked w adila?)
and when i said abit, she said it was either a yes or no. i knew she wouldnt take yes for an answer, looking at how the notice board was. and so i said no, reluctantly.
she scolded even more. she said she was disappointed.
"i dont think you're ready to be drum major next year" (actually, she made sense there. im not . plus, sery's making some changes on how to take care of discipline. im still not sure how)
"we have to re-look into you, hafiz." ( well, uhm, okay...) D';
and she also went on about leadership. and we weren't that good at it. it felt so like the last time i sat w adila at the red table, when they said they were going to have another batch of excos to try out, listening to mrs gan and mrs chee about all this leadership thing too. and our flaws. not one single praise.
she even said she had told all the other teachers and instructors about this.
ugh
and we didnt even get a simple good for our hard effort. she even said we only did it like, w/o effort. and compared to other noticeboards like npcc and choir which was beside ours. she even went to show us malay cultural club and chinese orchestra which was about 10 feet away.
To adila and i, those boards were full of pink. hello? band? yellow and green is our colour? but to mrs gan, it was colourful.
i mean, adila and i agreed that what we had done was the best JVCB noticeboard okay let's not brag, at least for that year alone.
the most we got was " at least its not as bad anymore''
not as bad!?@ what happened to good? just one simple good.
and oh yeah. there was this part, written JVCB in yellow. our background was white ( music scores actually)
she wasnt satisfied w that. she said it blended. she wanted contrast. and said people dont know what JVCB stands for and would just walk away. to me, those who dont know would come even nearer to find out.
she then said its up to us if we want to edit our work before gg back to the office.
i wanted to stay. i wanted to prove we could make up for our mistakes. and that we could be responsible. besides, wont she think even more that we're lazy and do things w/o effort ( which we arent) if we just left it as it is?
the only reason adila said she agreed to stay was cause she was worried for my post. you silly goose
so we stayed on.
we changed the yellow JVCB. to a red CONCERT BAND.
I SWEAR ON EVERYTHING I EVER LOVED ITS HORRENDOUS NOW. we super regret editing it. ugh
tag replies:
iqin :not the question stupid lah. my answer lah deng
elena :why ah? hmm im not so sure. But i think is cause you go 'work' with spirits then like cannot uh. aiya difficult to explain.
ahdila :heartbreaking huh
rita :woots, thanks !
Tuesday, December 16, 2008 5:25 AM
out of place
mistakes are minor setbacks in life. as long as you perservere, things will turn out for the better.
asyiqin posed me a random question just a few seconds ago. it says
" are you ready? to take over as drum major next year? "
i hesitated and said
"not really, actually" .
okay that's all. haha stupid , i know.
entry proper.
actually, there's nothing much to blog about. gahh i wonder why colours are fading nowadays. no, nowa-weeks. ( ??? )
okay im spilling.
actually, im feeling more and more out of place when im around people. people not my race. i used to be so comfortable fitting in. but i feel wierd now. kept wondering if the other party really wants to be with a guy like me. somehow feel disliked.
i no longer feel the sense of racial harmony.
in fact, sometimes, being with the malays in band(usually girls, not much boys) feels wierd too. they only talk about chinese guys now.
gahh, i think im just thinking too much.
:B come on, i gotta be cheerful. im gg to SP concert tomorrow. gotta be happy and fun!
wonder what im gonna wear. oh yeah, it doesnt really matter, does it?
who would care anyway?
hmm maybe i should wear singlet and shorts. oooh and and slippers.
no no, how about boxers.
pfft.
Monday, December 15, 2008 12:29 AM
kuda kepang
went to abang putra's wedding on saturday(131208) and sunday (141208). (saturday was for preparations)
the kuda kepang performance on these both days were simple, AWESOME.
kuda kepang is a traditional javanese performance whereby the performers get possesed by spirits
before roaming around with their wooden horses in a limited area.
and and the possessed just love being whipped. they also like coconut, using their teeth to pull off its husk.
sometimes, they come near you. they don't attack or harm you really. they just want you to wipe their sweat off. they don't really use their hands to work as they put them on the horse. instead, they use their teeth to carry stuff.
and sometimes, they try to run away. they were times when they run towards my direction. lucky i dodged hah. and the guys in the kuda kepang 'team' gave chased and brought him back before he caused any injuries to anyone or himself.
kuda kepang :
monkey possesed ? :
whipped :
releasing of spirits from body:
kuda kepang is so cool . but its sinful btw. sigh
if it wasnt, i would have joined. hahahha
tag replies : shaffiqa: hahah tau takot...scared right.. HAHAHHA
Saturday, December 13, 2008 7:35 AM
scrambled eggs special
i just tried out shaffiqa's new recipe last night.
ingredients:
2 eggs 1 tablespoon of oyster sauce 1 tablespoon of chilli sauce some soy sauce some pepper (ground/black/both)
method:
add all together. cook like scramble eggs.
GOSH its awesome. my cousin's sleeping over tonight. i cooked it for him. he asked me to cook more.
:B
7:05 AM
up front
it's been yonks since i heard from you. are you that busy?
Friday, December 12, 2008 10:45 PM
nintendo wii
tag reply:
ahdila :the headphones? aiyooo they so dont look like breasts! grr deon :aiya it's at your house so can say its yours lahh. elena : than your picture? hah
i forgot to mention that DEON has a nintendo wii ! gosh. how come i only know now? hahha ive always wanted a wii ! well, this is one reason to hang out at his crib more often hehhe
it was so fun yesterday playing wii w shaffiqa at his house. we played tennis, shooting and boxing.
my my was shaffiqa violent! chill, its just a game! the boxing felt abit real than expected (haha)
Thursday, December 11, 2008 5:17 AM
syf choice piece
HAPPY BIRTHDAY FIONA U MIAO RU!
YOU ARE FINALLY FINALLY 14! now you can say we're of the same age! im so proud if you. (wth?)
today? let's see.
i made ALOT of bloopers today. kept saying the wrong words.
like "swensens-mania" ( swensens+pastamania) and at kfc, i told the others i wanted more lettuce in my zinger. LETTUCE!?@ what the fuck? everyone actually went silent and deon asked me "lettuce? you mean mayonaise?" and there i went laughing my head off.
aiyoyoyooy
oh ya, percussion marched with instruments today. it wasnt that bad? at least our lines didnt go off THAT bad? it still looked straight okay? GO PERCUSSION ! ( and french horn. hehhe)
full band played EAGLE BEND - grade 3 1/2 tried out FATE OF THE GODS - grade 4 and FLYING HIGH -grade 4-5
i wanna play flying high. it gives us a higher chance of getting a gold. even if we get bronze, its better then playing eagle bend and getting a gold.
we play not bad what? well, not everyone. but improved.
mrs chia said that we could maybe change our SYF choice piece to flying high. it was a good thing yet a bad thing.
if we really are going to change our piece, i dont mind actually. but the rest of then band has worked hard for eagle bend. tutoring in school , hongkong music exchange , repeated combines. and its been one month and we want to change only now?
why didnt mrs chia speak up for flying high before? why cant she just suggest to mrs chee before? why must we only try out flying high again only when mrs chee is currently overseas?
in the first place, we didnt give up on flying high. we were confident(quite). but mrs chee wasnt. she's the one who changed the song.
compared to the last time we played flying high, its so so SO MUCH better now. when we play, our hearts beat faster (why ah? gah) felt so nervous, worried if any soloist would make one small mistake, one wrong note.
i have confidence that our band can actually play flyng high (grade 4-5). with hard work,determination and confidence. but look at the band, there are those unhappy about the second change. and there are those who are lazy. how? we cant even play eagle bend (grade 3 1/2) WOW-ly. what more a grade 4 going to 5 ?
we're left with about four months to syf. and we cant even decide on a song.
mrs chia is going for FLYING HIGH but mrs chee EAGLE BEND. (unless we change her mind by playing for her nicely)
you think choosing of songs is the only problem?
THUNDERER MARCH. the marching of the whole band as a squad while playing " thunderer march" is simply, HORRIBLE. i know we're not a millitary band, i cant expect too much. but cant they just simply march forward STRAIGH? follow their left or right markers?
sheesh!
im very worried now. syf is nearing. songs are in doubt, marching is bad. ( we need to send a video of us marching as an application to enter syf. every band has to do that)
and there goes my mum asking to switch off the comp. its 2200 now
Wednesday, December 10, 2008 4:35 AM
more picts
(hong kong )
the crazy :
clique( partially) my my, look at gwen's hair. too bad, she got scolded by mrs chee for her feelers. damn was gwen frustrated
frezzing people( w hood) outside by the hallway on party night. it was really freezing, the SUPER cold breeze were blowing hard from (my right side)
on the way up to the peak terrace:
bro and i ! (ugh, im short)
well, everyone has their ugly sides once in a while right? (sheesh!)
deon(michael jackson), fiona( wacky ?), hafiz( FUCK ! like primary sch kid siah ! )
us featuring PIG (oops) :
remember the golden statue of a flower i mentioned? nah :
space mountain fiona,hafiz- plain ugly gwen- sheesh! deon- still can care about hair (haha !)
dumb
actually, i dont quite remember posing for this one
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