im lost
im confused
i dont see anything else that i could do to make it any better.

my brain needs a map
my brain need some clues
any guidelines
any help

i know ive been given alot of chances
i know im at the very end now
i know its risky
i know i deserve this

but i just wish
i could have one last chance.
just one .
i'd turn back time and improve on every single little teeny weeny thing
i'll do my best.

but i cant turn back time.

its all about the future.

so i promise ill try my VERY VERY best
to turn things around
and not disapoint

but will it all be worthwhile ?

my brain tells me to give up
because its really hopeless.
and it might also not be such a good thing if i succeed .
( you wont understand )
but my heart tells me to work hard and go on
and not to disapoint anyone pinning high hopes on me
anyone who supports me

but im lost
what should i do

i dont see the right way in both these decisions
i dont seem to be happy in the outcome of these two decisions

maybe im thinking far too early
and negatively

but just which route shall i take ?